On Breastfeeding

Who here thinks that breastfeeding is supposed to be easy? *RAISES BOTH HANDS*

Yes, I thought breastfeeding was going to be easy breezy. How hard could it be to plug your wee babe to your boob?

How mightily mistaken was I. The first three weeks with baby P was okay. He'd wake up to feed every 2 to 3 hours. I slept when he slept. My complaint then was not getting enough sleep, among other household concerns. 

Suddenly, he was feeding every hour on the hour. He'd detach himself from my boob and be all asleep but when I'd  lay him down in the crib, he'd wail as if he was hungry and not feeding in the first place. So I'd feed him again. And again. For a few days, we'd be nursing for five hours straight.

They say you're supposed to nurse a baby equally from both breasts. For some reason, my left breast started hurting. It got engorged that it really really hurt when my baby nursed on it. I bore the pain for a week until I got a fever and chills. I was rushed to the ER where they diagnosed me with mastitis. I was given antibiotics for 2 weeks. Then, we started giving baby formula to add to my breast milk.

I also started expressing milk. I'd get 1-2 ounces from my good breast and a few drops from my left breast. So frustrating. The first few times I fed my baby formula because he was still hungry and I was already drained, I felt like a failure.

Two weeks passed and my left breast was still one hardened mess. We went to a pedia who's a lactation expert and she said I didn't have mastitis, only plugged ducts. I had to put warm compress, breastfeed, pump and take another week of antibiotics. She also prescribed lecithin to thin out my milk or something.

At the moment, I am on my second to the last day of antibiotics. My left boob is still all plugged up and I only get a few drops when I express from it. Thank God my right one is still okay. I lug around a small cooler and manual pump on the LRT to work so I could express twice in the office. Did I mention that I just moved to a new office so I am still adjusting?

Now my life can be summarized as: work, pump, breastfeed, wash and sterilize all pumping paraphernalia (manual and electric), breastfeed, try to sleep while baby is sleeping, and repeat.

Don't get me wrong, I want to give my child my breast milk. Heck, I'd even donate all my excess milk. But I never imagined it could physically hurt this much. Sigh. I hope my defective boob gets well soon. :(